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Monday, October 8, 2012

What Kids Hear Funny



** The Rosary **

From Groton, MA:
My mother spent her early childhood saying, "Hail Mary, full of grapes."


** Pledge of Allegiance **

Covina, CA:
I recall reading something years ago about the Pledge of Allegiance. Some child thought it began, "I led the pigeons to the flag."

Cleveland, OH:
When I was little, I often wondered who Richard Stands was. You know: "I pledge allegiance to the flag ... and to the republic for Richard Stands."


** Hymns **

Schenectady, NY:
I once knew a child whose favorite Sunday school song was "Gladly, the Cross-Eyed Bear."

Lake Forest Park, WA:
When I was a little girl, we sang a song in Sunday school about Noah. Part of the chorus was "And the rains came down, and the floods came up." We lived next door to a couple of charming little girls who always sang this song while playing in their garden. Their words were, "And the rains came down, and the spuds came up."


** The Creed **

Tampa, FL:
When my husband was 6 years old, he thought the creed said:
"He suffered under a bunch of violets."
The real words are "under Pontius Pilate," but at that age, he didn't know better.


** The Lord's Prayer **

From San Francisco:
When I was a child, I learned this prayer as "Our Father, who are in Heaven, Howard be thy name." I always thought that was God's real name.

Missoula, MT:
My son, who is in nursery school, said, "Our Father, who art in Heaven, how didja know my name?"

Uniontown, OH:
I remember thinking this prayer was "Give us this day our jelly bread."

Grand Junction, CO:
When I was younger, I believed the line was "Lead a snot into temptation." I thought I was praying for my little sister to get into trouble.

[forwarded by Gretchen Patti]

today'sTHOT============================

My wife wanted me to start taking cod liver oil for my health, but I thought there was something fishy about the whole idea.

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